Shit Parents Of The World Unite

I’m looking for other parents who work, drink, and can relate to our complete inability to juggle this many balls.

So I’m sitting down with my freshly opened bottle of “thank fuck my kids are finally in bed” Shiraz, having poured myself and my husband a much-deserved glass, and I’m flicking through Facebook. One of my gorgeous friends has posted photos of dairy free, egg free, vegan, nut free chocolate cupcakes for her son’s class at school. I nearly died. There’s clearly a bar some parents are working towards, whereas my bar is the one I got the Shiraz from. I poured my kids dinner from a pre-made soup package and gave them toast soldiers to give it some pizazz. I thought I was doing well. Yeah, so maybe I need to try harder.

Today was a cracking day for my overall parenting skills so I thought I’d share it with you. After all, there’s got to be more shit parents out there like me, and we all need to feel better about our efforts – or at least know that there’s other people in the same boat. Right?

So after leaving my daughter’s birthday party Bounce booking till only 3 weeks out from the party, I’ve missed all the good slots. Not to worry. My husband and I decide to be outrageous and have the party on a Friday afternoon. We booked it, paid, and even wrote out the invitations which we gave out today at school. Highly organised from the couple who sent text message invitations to our own wedding because we ran out of time to organise anything else (we booked the wedding about 10 months earlier, but I digress).

So here we are thinking we are finally nailing this parenting thing. Then I get a text message from one of the mums. We’ve booked the bloody thing on the same night as the school disco. Epic parenting fail right there. It was in the school newsletter but who really reads those things? Please tell me I’m not alone here.

At least we have other mums looking out for us, who text us when the sausage sizzle payment deadlines are upon us, or the uniform has changed for the day.

I thought with a kid in year one and another who just turned 4, that we’d be getting better at this job, but it’s still quite beyond us. So I’m just going to put it out there. How about all of us birds of a feature get together? But let’s not do it when the other parents have coffee and catch up during the day. I work and can’t make it to those catch ups either. I’m looking for other parents who work, drink, and can relate to our complete inability to juggle this many balls. Shit parents unite.

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